The morning sun grew hotter, and I felt sweat slide down the back of my neck as my hoe sliced into the base of a thistle plant. One after another, the prickly giants sank to their knees in defeat as I chopped and chopped. The mere mention of hoeing thistles was enough to raise wails …
Tag: relationship with God
Expressing negative emotions
I'm a sensitive person in more ways than one. Perhaps my deafness has made me more aware of my physical environment than most. My brain is a constant tumble of observations, thoughts, feelings, and intuitions. If I'm not careful, I can quickly collapse under the weight of what I perceive in my environment, in myself, …
Our Best Life Now
In Joel Osteen's popular book Your Best Life Now, he details how to go about securing the best life possible for yourself, mostly through positive thinking and believing that God will give you everything you want. I thought about this "best life" while struggling through wondering if our family was truly living the life that God …
How unrest leads to life
There's this thing called contentment, and I still have a series in the back of my mind that includes this subject, but sometimes "contentment" is taken too far. People cry from hearts bursting with emptiness, "What am I supposed to be doing?" and others say, "You can always pray!" "Do the best with what you …
Jesus Only
Matthew 17 tells the story of Jesus taking Peter, James, and John to a mountain, where they witnessed His transfiguration. The Bible says, "his face shone as the sun, and his clothes became white as light." For a moment, Moses and Elijah were also present. The disciples responded by falling on their faces and worshiping Jesus. I'm not …
heartbreak
God, I cannot sleep, Even though I'm exhausted, I cannot sleep because the pain strikes so deep. So deep it pins me to my bed. I want to get up to pray, to touch his suffering skin, but it hurts too much. The sob lies stillborn in my throat as I think about my son …
Bible Reading in the New Year
In 2016 I read through a chronological Bible for the first time, and thoroughly enjoyed it. Now that I am done, I feel a little like I've lost my moorings. What am I going to do now? Let me tell you about my Bible reading last year. I've read through the Bible many times since …
Bringing My Gift To Him
Ending one year and beginning another always stirs some self-reflection in my heart. What have I done this past year, and what will I be doing in the next? Have I loved Jesus well, and how can I grow with Him in the coming months? This morning as I was listening to a sermon at …
Equation
One night I woke with a start, sensing that something was wrong. Sitting up in bed, I saw a small form standing in the doorway of my bedroom, holding a blanket and crying. "Come, Keane!" I called softly. He toddled over to my bed, dragging his blanket. I picked him up and hugged him. “Are you scared, …
of death and pain
Yesterday marked the third year since my lovely 18-year-old cousin Anja died. I saw this picture of her on Facebook, and my already-low spirits plummeted. How can death be God's will? When faced with death and pain, so many people piously fold their hands and gaze heavenward and say, "Thy will be done!" as if it really is God's …