I have been reading and re-reading the book of Hebrews. Rich, astonishing themes play throughout the book. This is what impressed me the most during the last read:

Therefore, as the Holy Spirit says,
“Today, if you hear his voice,
do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion,
on the day of testing in the wilderness,
where your fathers put me to the test
and saw my works for forty years.

(Hebrews 3:7-9 ESV)

Today if you hear His voice, do not harden your heart. You have seen His faithfulness.

My heart gets hardened by fear.

I am afraid of so many things.

What will people think if I follow God’s leading instead of common sense? What will happen to my kids if we live in a town far from the idyllic Mennonite community? Will we find many heart-friends in this town? I don’t want to be alone! What if I miss a crucial opportunity to show care to someone? What if we try to house church, and it goes splat? How can I survive when my decisions hurt people I love very dearly? What if I totally lose it, and in five years I’m not even a Christian because I tried to follow God but was deceived instead?

During the night, this verse came to me (again from Hebrews):

And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him.

(Hebrews 11:6 ESV)

I choose to believe that if I follow God to the best of my ability, He WILL reward me, even if I don’t get it all right. He cherishes my fumbling attempts to obey His voice. And He will be just as faithful in the future as He has been in the past.

Jesus, take away my fear so that I can hear from You.

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What is God telling you to do today, and what is keeping you from doing it?