I’m back

On By RosinaIn Inner Life

I’m sitting in our local coffee shop, sipping a creamy latte out of a blue ceramic cup and forking down the most delicious crepes.

“Overwhelming” is a mild word to state what life has been for me this summer. Navigating a pandemic, finalizing an adoption, mothering five children, working part-time, starting a ranch, and facing multiple uncertainties has taken its toll.

All these months the words and feelings have been churning inside of me, longing for space to process and spill out. This year has been hard as I work on making sense of my world and finding my identity, which seems to be an ongoing process regardless of current events.

Both overwhelm and depression have choked my words, but I’m finally back (I think). I have a rough draft written to be finished and published soon, and notes for several more posts. This summer I wondered if blogging did anyone any good, but I’m seeing that I need it for myself. It’s how I process life, and I need it even if nobody else does.

So I’m writing again, even if it’s by bits and pieces between the daily tasks. This morning I will finish my latte then go plant some alfalfa and check on my new trees. After that I have a full day of laundry, housecleaning, cooking, and childcare. It’s not an easy stage.

What challenges have you been facing this year? And how can I pray for you or bless you?

 

15 thoughts on “I’m back”

  1. Catherine Yoder

    I’m looking forward to hearing what you have to say. I feel like I have been in a dark tunnel and suddenly there is a glimmer of light and anticipation about what is ahead…maybe there is “life” after so much non-normal.

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  3. Anonymous

    Rosina, it is so good to hear from you! Just reading about your life feels overwhelming – I can’t imagine living it :). May God bless you with His presence!
    Our family is navigating through a response to the order from our state governor to wear face coverings. We believe that Romans 13 and 1 Peter 2 apply to this situation. Currently, we are the only family in our community who is wearing face coverings to church & school. This is much harder than it sounds. But God is here with us.

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      1. Beth

        Your life sounds very full! May God give you courage for every step. I truly appreciate your blog posts and rarely wait to read them when I see a new one. I devour them promptly! Do not think they go unnoticed. You have been an encouragement to me in many ways even tho we have never met face to face.

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        1. Thank you, Beth! I’m glad if my posts can be a blessing even when I don’t write as much as I wish I could. 🙂 And I would love to meet you in person someday!

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    2. Anonymous

      We may be in different places but we know the feeling of standing alone! It is no easy thing. Your comment gave me courage! When you feel you are alone, know that there are others trying to navigate the same waters. Courage to you!

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  6. Haley

    You are a deep thinker/writer.
    Several close family deaths in the last few years and church issues are taking the toll with us currently.
    And this is none of my business but I am curious as to why you “work” outside of the home. As a wife and Mom I enjoy studying as to what a wife and Mom’s role all look like in the light of Titus 2. So anyway just regard this question if you want too. I absolutely don’t want to come across as judgemental or rude!
    May God bless you! I’m inspired tonight.

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    1. Thank you for your comment, Haley. I’m sorry you’ve had hard times lately!

      Regarding a mother’s role, I keep thinking of writing more on it but haven’t delved into it yet. The short answer is that I think it’s possible to be a good “keeper at home” without being home and with my children 24/7. Culture already dictates “acceptable” ways of doing this that most people don’t think twice about.

      For instance, many good Christian moms send their kids to a private school where the kids are away from home 35-40 hours a week. I work outside the home 25 hours a week (two 12.5 hour days) but homeschool my children. So I’m actually at home with my kids more than most Christian moms that know. When I’m gone, my husband takes care of the children and he loves being so involved with teaching them.

      So I think there’s more than one good way to be a keeper at home and present mother to our children.

      For me, work is a mission that I love so, so much. I may never be one to do the big splashy things in the church, but give me the sick and I will love them and care for them. It’s helped me gain access to the inner life of our community.

      Thank you for asking! I might have given you a longer answer than you wanted! 😃

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      1. Haley

        Thanks! Yeah I can agree that many of us just do things because so many others do it but it isn’t necessarily the best way…
        That’s great that your husband cares for the children while you’re working.

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